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Welcome
to the rest of the universe!
"I want out!" Henrietta thought to herself. "There's no way I'm going on a tent tour of the world.
Tents are yucky and cold and wet and lumpy and filled with bugs and they smell bad too." She brooded and
brooded. She could think of a thousand reasons why not to tour the world by tent. But she had not been able think
of one killer excuse to tell her Daddy why she absolutely, without question, could NOT go with them. The main reason
was that he had caught the whole family by surprise on the way home one night from Aunt Nelly's Junkfood Buffet. None
of the Furdley brood had been fully aware of the danger at that point because their minds were clouded with sugar, salt, MSG,
caffeine, and additives that jam neurons and survival instincts.
Gogol lived in a Siberian round tent. His furnishings were simple. There was his cot and a Russian Army field
table with one chair. The table served as the office, bathroom sink, and dinner table when he ate inside, which was very seldom.
He had a footlocker to keep his clothing and private possessions. The door to the tent opened to the south so
he could watch the going and coming of the sun. He liked to put his chair in the doorway and smoke Lucky Strike cigarettes
for hours. But it was very comfortable weather today so he sat outside where he had established a small fire pit and
a place to sit. He also had a pretty smooth, reasonably flat rock on which his vodka and eating gear rested. The beans
were ready!
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